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Twisted Confessional | Kol

Familiars

Familiars of Lxndr

note: the elemental gravy fairies are named after high school crushes. the baby gravy fairy is labeled with an earlier crush.

  • Glasflugel, a Mosquito (a flying machine)
  • Kenucky, a Leprechaun - (leprechauns are also called a lubrican, k-y is a lubricanT, Kenucky is Kentucky without the T, so a Lubrican.)
  • Culosis, a Levitating Potato (potatoes are a popular tuber)
  • Mister Custer, a Angry Goat (as in the general)
  • Lind, a Sabre-Toothed Lime (lime trees are 'linden trees', also lind was the doctor who proved the scuvry - citrus connection)
  • Sicherman, a Fuzzy Dice (I'm a math geek, google 'sicherman dice')
  • Dark Water, a Spooky Pirate Skeleton (Ren and his faithful crew)
  • Goose, a Barrrnacle (it was thought geese came from barnacles at one point, wacky huh?)
  • Batz, a Howling Balloon Monkey (Mayan name for the howler monkey/god)
  • Vespers, a Stab Bat (the famous bats are 'vesper' bats)
  • Bleen, a Grue (from the New Riddle of Induction)
  • Manos, Hand of Fate, a Blood-Faced Volleyball (an obvious reference)
  • Pickman, a Ghuol Whelp (a should-be-obvious Lovecraft reference)
  • Carolyn Lipinski, a Baby Gravy Fairy (childhood crush outside of school)
  • Phonics, a Cocoabo - (after the bird)
  • Oh Be A Fine Girl, Kiss Me!, a Star Starfish (an astronomy mnemonic)
  • Hobbes, a Hovering Sombrero (from a favorite Calvin comic)
  • Perfectly Ordinary, a Ghost Pickle on a Stick (like the factory)
  • Warwick E. Kerr, a Killer Bee (the father of all killer bees)
  • Colin Mochrie, a Whirling Maple Leaf (a canadian)
  • Vater Orlaag, a Clockwork Grapefruit (Malcolm McDowell, who starred in A Clockwork Orange, played this character in Metalocalypse, working title Deathclock)
  • Destroid, a MagiMechTech MicroMechaMech (the non-transforming robots from Robotech)
  • Rebecca Davis, a Flaming Gravy Fairy (hottest high school crush)
  • Anna Minton, a Frozen Gravy Fairy (hardest one to choose)
  • Adrianne Bergler, a Stinky Gravy Fairy (SOMEONE had to be, and I think she'd appreciate this)
  • Jessica Tiffany Davis, a Spooky Gravy Fairy (probably my first crush, went goth before I lost touch with her)
  • Fetch, a Doppelshifter - (a fetch is another name for a doppelganger)
  • Siembieda, a Temporal Riftlet - (as in Kevin, author of Rifts)
  • Drosselmeyer, a Sweet Nutcracker (The creator of the Nutcracker)
  • Petra, a Pet Rock (the study of rocks is petrology)
  • Duncan, a Snowy Owl (a brand of yo yo)
  • Roosevelt, a Teddy Bear (duh)
  • Monster Mash, a Ninja Pirate Zombie Robot (it's an amalgam of several 'monster' types)
  • Jenny Herring, a Sleazy Gravy Fairy (you'd have to know her; oh yeah)
  • Captain Bucky, a Wild Hare - (the name choice here should be obvious)
  • Yakkity Yak, a Wind-up Chattering Teeth (a brand of chattering teeth)
  • Rover, a Spirit Hobo (hobos wander; also, he's meant to work with Fetch)
  • Jaye Tyler, a Comma Chameleon - (from the show Wonderfalls)
  • Ludlow, the Misshapen Animal Skeleton (Pet Semetary)
  • Atkins, a Scary Death Orb (carbohydrates!)
  • Jack Bauer, a Reassembled Blackbird (baked in a pie - Kiefer Sutherland)
  • One Thousand, a Origami Towel Crane (an origami crane reference)
  • Beautiful and Unique, a Ninja Snowflake (because even if I'm not, my snowflake is)
  • Let Me Be Your, a Evil Teddy Bear (another duh)
  • Amber, a Toothsome Rock (tooth/rock = fossil = amber)
  • Skull Theodore, a Ancient Yuletide Troll - (from Pvponline)
  • Lafcadio, a Dandy Lion (like the Shel Silverstein book)
  • von Neumann, a O.A.F. (a computer scientist)
  • Angelo Terra, a Penguin Goodfella - (The Penguins sang 'Earth Angel' - this is simply that title translated)
  • Jesse Garon, a Jumpsuited Hound Dog (Elvis' stillborn twin)
  • Mackie Messer, a Green Pixie - (Mack the Knife)
  • Garibaldi, a Ragamuffin Imp (named after the freedom fighter that helped with the war of the tatters in Brazil)
  • Kokapetl, a Exotic Parrot (the parrot from Mysterious Cities of Gold)
  • Peter Adkison, a Wizard Action Figure - (founder of Wizards of the Coast, and M:TG)
  • Onionhead, a Gluttonous Green Ghost (the original name of slimer)
  • Chell, a Bulky Buddy Box (main character of Portal, also a female name to keep with the pattern)
  • Ruxpin, a Teddy Borg (clearly, this name fits)
  • Toulouse, a Robogoose (a breed of geese known for their eggs)
  • Hollerith, a El Vibrato Megadrone (inventor of the modern punch card system)
  • Korsakoff, a Mad Hatrack (named after the mercury poisoning madness syndrome that hatters get)
  • Chacoda, an Adorable Seal Larva (the grandson of Hoover, the talking seal)
  • Leonardo, an Untamed Turtle (completing the quadfecta)
  • Darkwing Al Dente, an Animated Macaroni Duck (oh, come on)
  • Casey, a Pet Cheezeling (cheese is caesum)
  • Blackpool, an Autonomos Disco Ball (largest disco ball at the time of this writing)
  • Dinky, a Mariachi Chihuahua (the name of the original Taco Bell dog)
  • Three Alarmer, a Llama Lama (a reference to the famous Ogden Nash poem, as this is a 'three l lllama')
  • Ben Hawkins, a Cotton Candy Carnie (from Carnivale, a carnival worker who had healing powers)
  • Bigby, a Disembodied Hand (a Greyhawk/D&D reference)
  • Proserpina, the Black Cat (the cat in Poe's story was named Pluto; this is the female counterpart to Pluto in Roman myth)
  • Sweetwater, a Baby Mutant Rattlesnake (a reference to the Rattlesnake Round Up)
  • Greenbeard, a Mutant Fire Ant (a reference to the genetic green-beard hypothesis, found in the fire ant)
  • Tenochtli, a Mutant Cactus Bud, (the name of a mythical cactus bud in Aztec)
  • Killer Shrew, a Mutant Gila (Monster, a reference to the companion to the feature film the Giant Gila Monster)
  • Bones, a Cuddlefish (There was a groundbreaking book of poetry "Cuttlefish Bones" - also a secondary Dr. McCoy reference)
  • Mama Gingertree, a Sugar Fruit Fairy (a character in Candyland that supplanted a plum character)
  • Jackson, a Imitation Crab (imitation crab is made from a fish called Pollock, there's an artist Jackson Pollock)
  • Littau, a Pair of Ragged Claws (There was a "Prufrock-Littau Company" in St Louis at the time Eliot lived there, a furniture store.)
  • Custard, a Magic Dragonfish (the song 'Puff the Magic Dragon' was inspired by an Ogden Nash poem about 'Custard the dragon')
  • Whitefood, a Frumious Bandersnatch (a Known Space/Niven reference)
  • Flip, a Magic Clownfish (a Finding Nemo/Little Nemo reference)
  • Donatello, a Syncopated Turtle (I <3 Donnie, ad so I give him to this turtle, especially since it's so item-focused)
  • Michaelangelo, a Grinning Turtle (the funloving member of the TMNT)
  • Bruiser, a Purse Rat (the dog from Legally Blonde)
  • Raphael, a Wereturtle (known for his temper, Raphael is definitely the beast of the TMNT)
  • King Rag, a Baby Sandworm (King Ragworms are otherwise known as sandworms)
  • Pulchritude, a He-Boulder (Beauty is Pulchritude, and is in the eye of the He-boulder)
  • Commodore, a Rock Lobster (keeping with the sea theme, and also this was the code name for Commodore's new Amiga system)
  • Sonic, an Urchin Urchin (Urchin is another name for a hedgehog)
  • Elastoplast, a Grouper Groupie (one of the groupie girls from Almost Famous)
  • Prometheus, a Squamous Gibberer (Cthulhu -> Necronomicon -> Necronomonopoly -> Monopoly -> movie -> Ridley Scott -> Prometheus)
  • Premature Ejaculation, a Stocking Mimic (an anagram of Stocking Mimic is 'Cock Mistiming')
  • Fargo, a Snow Angel (the largest group snow angel maker was in Bismarck, so I picked Fargo)
  • Ermine, a Jack in the Box (Pop Goes The Weasel -> Weasel -> Ermine)
  • Miracle Mike, a BRICKO Chick (named after the chicken that lived for months after its head was removed)
  • Glitterati, a Baby Bugged Bugbear (Bugbear Entertainment put out a game called Glitterati; since it's software, it must be bugged, right?)
  • Geronimo, an Underworld Bonsai (Banzai = Geronimo)
  • F\n, a Rogue Program (f-new-line = Flynn, a somewhat obvious Tron reference)
  • Norman Mailer, a Mini-Hipster (an old-school hipster that probably fits into the new-school hipster mentality as well)
  • Terra Cotta, Pottery Barn Owl (the earliest known yo-yo was made of Terra Cotta, which is also a clay/pot thing)
  • Granada, a Hippo Ballerina (dance of the hours = hello mudda, hello fadda)
  • Chris Rowe, a Knob Goblin Organ Grinder (Joe Bush is a well-known Organ Grinder in the States; Joe Bush is also a well-known ghost, whose identity is often theorized to be Chris Rowe)
  • Splinter, a Smiling Rat (named to begin the TMNT theme that will continue with the turtle familiars I will later collect)
  • Blinker, a Robot Reindeer (sounds like a reindeer name, relates to the blinking lights, and is also another term for the 'blinders' of a horse's bridling)
  • Holly, a Holiday Log (keeping with the female names of the pet rock types)
  • Abbott, an Obtuse Angel (a reference to the author of Flatland, and also a religious reference)
  • Deacon, a Li'l Xenomorph (the nickname of the 'alien' in the horrible movie Prometheus)
  • Mod Oai, a Dataspider (Mod Oai is a web-spider augmentation)
  • Kuribo, a Pair of Stomping Boots (Super Mario Bros 3)
  • Hank Neville, a Feral Kobold (Kobolds Ate My Baby -> Dingo Ate My Baby -> Azaria Chamberlain -> Hank Azaria/Neville Chamberlain)
  • Aunt Sally, a Fancypants Scarecrow (A reference to a logical fallacy Straw Man by its UK parlance)
  • Rocksteady Candy, a Peppermint Rhino (Rocksteady from TMNT, + Rock Candy)
  • Freejack, a Tickle-me Emilio (a reference to an Emilio Estevez movie)
  • Valva, a Steam-Powered Cheerleader (feminizing the word 'Valve')
  • Marge, a Happy Medium (Large Marge... 'happy medium at large')
  • Vandal, an Artistic Goth Kid (the vandals were a tribe in rivalry with the goths, and 'vandal' and 'artist' work well)
  • Weekend, a Flaming Face (Weekend at Bernies - "Burning")
  • Hangkenstein's Monster, a Reagnimated Gnome (Hangk + Frankenstein's Monster)
  • Vanitas, a Talkative Skull (the symbolism of Yorick)
  • Carrion Crawler, a Skulldozer (bulldozers are crawlers, skull carrion)
  • Master Rakoczi, an Avatar of the Unconscious Collective (Saint Germain)
  • Corona, a Nanorhino (besides the rhinovirus, the coronavirus causes the common cold)
  • Voorhies, an Oily Woim (comes from the oily boid, early bird, morning lark, lark voorhies)
  • Slim Pickens, a Crimbo P.R.E.S.S.I.E. (pressie is VINCENT from Black Hole, Slim played BOB, the other robot)
  • Rosie, a Homemade Robot (Jetson!)
  • Postmaster General, a MiniMechaElf (anagram gives 'Mailmen Chief')
  • Melgrim, a Gelatinous Cubeling (from the one named adventurer in this strip http://www.angryflower.com/everyb.gif)
  • Trelane, an Adorable Space Buddy (Star Trek TOS's immature Q being)
  • Nariz, a Nosy Nose (Spanish for nose, it kinda sounds like a name, don't you think?)
  • Aeae, a Mini-Adventurer (My smaller opposite, my missing vowels)
  • Oriole, a Mechanical Songbird (named after the Toot Oriole)
  • Doctor Mordrid, a Reanimated Reanimator (Another character played by Jeffrey Combs, who played Herbert West in the movie Reanimator)
  • Mark Meadows, an Astral Badger (Captain Trips from Wild Cards, he became a superhero whenever he took psychedelics)
  • Hangman's Joke, a Reconstituted Crow (name of Eric Dresden's band in the Crow TV show)
  • Kerry, a Galloping Grill (the Galloping Gourmet is Graham Kerr - hence 'Kerry')
  • Rask, a Praying Grim Brother (Erasmus Rask is credited to Grimm's rule)
  • Thankstaking, a Fist Turkey (it's a fairy that also takes meat. A good name for Thanksgiving)
  • Humbug, a Crimbo Shrub (he's way too excited for the holiday, therefore he is the humbug that Scrooge always Bahs)
  • Hendrickson, a Baby Z-Rex (Sue was a zombie t-rex in Harry Dresden, she was named after Sue Hendrickson, the paleontologist that found her)
  • Bah, a Mini-Crimbot (the companion to Humbug)
  • Armus, a Putty Butty (The killer of Tasha Yar)
  • Vecna, a Warbear Drone (Vecna Technologies created the Battlefield Extraction-Assist Robot, or BEAR)
  • SaltyBet, a Helix Fossil (Helix Fossil is inspire by Twitch Plays Pokémon, which was inspired by an earlier game called SaltyBet)
  • Henry le Moko, a Topiary Skunk (the inspirations to Pepe Le Pew)
  • Waco Williams, an Adventurous Spelunker (Tom Selleck's character in Maverick, which was the inspiration of Indiana Jones)
  • Welldigger, a Golden Monkey (Tales from the Gold Monkey was going to be called Tales of the Brass Monkey - and "colder than a brass monkey's balls" relates to "colder than a well-digger's asshole).
  • Santorum, a Sludgepuppy (Sludge Puppy is slang for poop, Santorum a sexual act related to poop)
  • Andrew Silverstein, a Hannukimbo Dreidl (Andrew Dice Clay's real name, the Dreidl is basically a clay die)
  • Sweet Emulsion, a Baby Mayonnaise Wasp (a play on 'Sweet Emotion', mayo is an emulsion)
  • Oberon, a Mr. Puck-man (Oberon is Puck's king)
  • Titania, a Ms. Puck-man (Titania is Oberon's queen)
  • Bubba Cornelius, a Lil' Barrel Mimic (names of tiny kegs, small barrels)
  • Tyke, a Machine Elf (besides "machine elves", the guy who named these strange phenomenon also called them tykes)
  • Love Is Here and Now You're Gone, a Rockin' Robin (the B-side of the famous song)
  • Chocoyaki, a Choctopus (Chocolate + Takoyaki, an octopus dish)
  • Bucranium, a Restless Cow Skull (it means bull cranium)
  • Like Dat, an Intergnat (Like Dat music was the owner of the trademark of "Intergnat" until 2006)
  • The Twenty-Seventh Letter, a Hobo Monkey (Ampersand was the monkey in Y: The Last Man, both were capuchins).
  • Midge, a Software Bug (the first software bug was a literal moth, which is etymologyically related to Midge, which is a derivative of Margaret)
  • Keneran, a Bark Scorpion (The scorpion hatchling was a gift from Narenek, as I could not for the life of me get one to drop)
  • Eleven, a Trick-or-Treating Tot (a Stranger Things reference)

Missing Familiars

Need Work:

  • Miniature Sword and Martini Guy (Soylent Steel)

Purchaseable:

Other Mr Familiars:

  • Angry Jung Man
  • Baby Yeti
  • Casagnova Gnome
  • Cheshire Bat
  • Chauvinist Pig
  • Coffee Pixie
  • Crimbo Elf
  • Cymbal Playing Monkey
  • Dramatic Hedgehog
  • Emo Squid
  • Feather Boa Constrictor
  • Hand Turkey
  • Hunchbacked Minion
  • Inflatable Dodecapede
  • Jill-O-Lantern
  • Jitterbug
  • Nervous Tick
  • Personal Raincloud
  • Piano Cat
  • Psychedelic Bear
  • Pygmy Bugbear Shaman
  • Uniclops